Holiday party season is in full swing and with it comes questions on greeting, lending the hostess a hand, eating, arrival times and being sure to say the proper ‘thanks’. These things may seem to come first nature, but if you think that it’s easy – think again.
1. Hostess Gift. Before heading to the party, be sure to pick out the proper hostess gift. This does not need to be expensive or lavish, but creativity is a necessity. These items are sure to please but can also be purchased at the local grocery store.
* Flowers – Bring the hostess a simple, but elegant flower arrangement that can be placed on the dinner table for everyone to enjoy. This gift will also be something to decorate the home well after the party is over. Some ideas are herbs growing in pretty, decorative pots, or even a bright poinsettia to add color to the event.
* Morning-after Kit – A fun idea for a hostess gift is to wrap a box of pancake or muffin mix, two mugs, and a bag of aromatic ground coffee. This gift will be appreciated by both the host and their family the morning after the party.
* Just Desserts – Purchase a fancy ice cream scoop with a couple of delicious ice cream cartons and toppings. Even if a dessert has been planned for the party, this gift will be something that can be enjoyed by the host at a later date.
2. Make an Entrance. Never arrive to a party early. Chances are the hostess is running around trying to finish all of the last minute details and the last thing that she wants at this point in the evening is to hear the doorbell ring. The proper time to arrive to a party is within 15 minutes of the event’s start. If it is a dinner party and you are going to be late, be sure to let the host know in advance so that everyone is not waiting for you to start the meal.
* Smile – Even if you had a horrible commute to the event and find yourself wanting to spill gruesome details of your travels, fight the urge and go into the party with a warm smile, greeting the other guests.
3. Engage in Conversation. Be sure to talk to everyone at the gathering. Ask open-ended questions, so that you don’t get one-word, dead-end answers. Ask people things like, “What are your holiday plans?” This is a simple query that will open the door to a whole conversation, getting things started easily.
4. If You Don’t Know Anyone. Even if you are unsure if you will know anyone at the party, there are a few tips to follow to assist you in the mingling department –
* Select a Target. Chances are that there will be others at the gathering that have arrived alone. Look for someone with an engaging smile, or if you see a guest that seems to have their eyes glued to their phone, this may be the perfect opportunity because chances are that they are anxious about being at the event alone too. It is also easier to approach people in groups of three or more, which tend to be more welcoming to a new face.
* Start the Conversation with Something Basic. Instead of walking right up to someone and introducing yourself, which might intimidate them, start with a simple observation about the evening. One idea may be talking about the food like, “The shrimp is amazing!” This is much less awkward than a cold introduction and could end up being the perfect warm-up to a great conversation.
* Don’t Cling. If you have bonded with someone at the party, be sure not to utilize all of their time during the evening. Make a point to only spend a few times with this ‘new found friend’. It is certainly a great idea for you to return for follow-up talks later, but leave the door open for both of you to meet other people at the party.
5. Make a Graceful Exit. Instead of dragging out your goodbyes so that you feel awkward on the commute back home, simply thank your host for the great time you had, and apologize for having to depart so soon. If the host retorts back with “You‘re leaving already?” Simply come back by telling them that you had a great time and you can’t wait to get together again. Leaving confidently will be less dramatic, making your exit smooth and swift.
* When is the Perfect Time to Leave? It is never good to be the first or the last person to exit a gathering. Proper etiquette shows that you should stay for the cake or the toast, if that is part of the party. If you must leave early, be sure to explain that beforehand to avoid the back-and-forth on the way out.
* What is ‘ghosting’? Ghosting is disappearing from a party without anyone noticing, and this is never acceptable unless you are at a very large gathering and no one will even notice that you have left. Besides that instance, the best way is to at least thank your host and offering a good-bye to other guests.
* How to Know if You have Overstayed Your Welcome. It is past time to call it a night when the host begins putting away the snacks and drinks and is picking up around the house and turning off the music. If you do happen to find yourself in this situation it’s best not to apologize about staying too late because the host will automatically feel obligated to reply, ‘No, stay!’ At this point the best thing to do is thank them for inviting you.
