Patricia Rossi’s Blog

Everyone wants to be valued. Whether it’s at the office, a social engagement, or when surrounded by family – we all want the people around us to ‘like’ us and enjoy being in our company. Having unlikable traits makes it more difficult to connect with others.

A common misconception in the world today is that in order to be a likable person, we must possess special traits, like being highly skilled or good looking.

Instead, we can all be deemed as likable by others by just using more social intelligence and by doing things like listening and having more compassion.

Being relatable and likable in the workplace is so powerful that it can even alter your overall performance. Because of this fact, it is highly important to keep a keen eye out, making sure that you don’t possess any behaviors that may be holding your back.

The following are some of the top things that may make you unlikable to others –

1~ Gossip. Gossip is never a good idea and it makes you ugly. Even if you didn’t start the gossip, listening to it and passing it on is just as bad. Participating in this activity will never have a good outcome as someone will probably end up feeling hurt. It can also be a way of getting yourself labeled and disrespected by colleagues.

2~ Bragging. No one likes a bragger. Let other people compliment you on your accomplishments rather than boasting and bragging about them yourself. Doing this only down plays the things that you’ve achieved and annoys others.

3~ Using Your Phone. Nothing belittles a person more than when they are talking and the other person pulls out their cell phone to glance at a text. If you are in the middle of a live conversation, anything on your cell phone can wait. Don’t ever pull out your phone until you are back at your desk.

4~ Name Dropping. It’s nice to know important people in the world, and hearing about them once can be interesting to others – but name-dropping during daily conversations becomes as bad to co-workers as bragging. You don’t want to be the person at the office that no one wants to spend time with or talk to. While conversing with colleagues, ask questions and listen to them instead of taking the floor constantly and talking about who you know.

5~ Over Sharing. Healthy relationships, both at work and socially, take time to build and grow. Even if you meet someone at the office that you seem to hit it off immediately with, be careful to avoid over sharing your personal problems. By sharing too much, you come across as insensitive and self-obsessed.

When you make yourself aware of how your words and actions are received by others, you can begin to work on fine tuning your unlikable traits to become a better colleague, family member and friend.